Ok, well the title doesn’t really do the process justice. It’s actually an awful move dreaded by every member of your household, and where close friends suddenly get completely booked with (only important ones of course!)social and work events and deadlines. They become the most unreachable people in southeast SC.
Then, the packing begins and the sorting…oh the sorting!! Keep, throw away, keep (but where?!), throw away, repeat. You throw something away just to reach back into the trash and realize that you can’t throw away that last birthday card given to you by your mom. She’s not elderly, but no one knows their last day on earth, and besides it’s sweet. Ok keep and throw into the nearest random box.
I’ve lived in this one house for twelve years. I closed on it the day before my 22nd birthday with my now ex husband. We couldn’t believe that this beautiful brand new house that we had chosen and built was all ours! We brought Jack home from the hospital in 2006, Molly in 2008, and our surprise, Miller, home in 2011. Every moment of their child hood is wrapped up into this house and those god forsaken boxes. We became friends with neighbors that have moved on, some that stayed, and several that passed away. My children attended all of the same pre-schools and elementary schools until my ex husband and I separated. I still feel physical pain knowing the heartbreak that my children have known through that horrible process. I want to be enough, but as one parent it’s so hard.
I met a man December 31st, 2014 and we fell in love. Nothing is ever perfect, but I knew he was a good fit for me and that I loved him. And he instantly loved my children. From a broken past, he knows exactly what not to do and has the qualities to make them see and feel how loved they are by him. It makes me love him even more.
He deployed for six long months last year and it was trying times, but he came back ready to commit to us. We signed to build a home one day before our 1st anniversary, got engaged one month later, and married three months after that. He moved into our tiny 1500 sq ft home and very quickly into all of my children’s hearts. My youngest, Miller, thinks he’s just an “extra dad” with the love he has shown to Trey, my husband. Miller is too young to remember a time without Trey in his life and just adores him.
March blew in, one month before our wedding date, and a tragic incident happened to one of my students. With the blessing of my principal, I was allowed to take her into my home and care for her. It’s been a sacrifice for our very newly blended family. As newlyweds, my husband and I slept in the same room for weeks and weeks with my 7 year old in order to provide our “new 18 year old” some privacy to heal and focus on her studies before high school graduation. Although inconvenient, I love that I have the means to be able to help this brilliant young woman that has so many dreams that are within her grasp, yet no one to steer her. She has a sweet soul.
Months passed and the school year came to a close and summer break began. Since then, we’ve hit the ground running, first putting the house on the market which sold within the day, then repairs, inspections, appraisals and such.
In the meantime, the constant paperwork, choices, and phone calls are dealt with for the home under construction. Finally, the house is done and we close tomorrow, and my current home is also ready to close.
It all took forever, but yet it’s come so fast. My daughter slept over with a close friend in the neighborhood tonight and the boys spent their last night in the only home they’ve ever known with the mattresses pushed together and their hands held as they drifted to sleep. It was so bittersweet to see brothers that are 5 years apart hold on to one another. They’ll never know how much I love them.
Tomorrow is closing and moving into OUR new home. One that we bought together with the children in mind and their needs and wants. And with the square footage to keep ourselves sane and our marriage intact.
I’m hopeful for the future, a new home, new life-long friends for the kids, and for my brand new marriage that I want to get right this time. We both do.
We may be hiring moving trucks, shuffling around boxes and becoming irritated tomorrow, but this is a significant moment. We are truly blending a family, beginning our story in OUR space. The kids may have learned to walk and talk in my home, but they will get their first kiss, go to middle school, try out for their first high school athletic team, leave one night with their prom date, graduate high school, college, and bring home their future spouse one day while living in our new home.
Looking back is sad, but those memories will never leave me.
Looking forward is exciting and being in those moments will be such an enormous blessing.
Thank you, God, for all of my wonderful blessing. I’m beyond RICH in people and in love. Amen.